The fear of losing something (which seems) dearest to me

A few consecutive incidents that happened within a day had made me realize that the job i am holding now is not completely mine, yet, I am still under probation.

Maybe this is my first formal job, I have always thought that probation can be cleared easily; the possibility of failing one is low, till one of my colleagues left. I was rather traumatize by that, and became very very conscious when I am delivering my tasks late (cause it is part of my goals to deliver on time) . I am sincerely hoping that I would be able to clear my probation and celebrate the 4th PD and so on with my fellow batch mates. Praying hard nowww!

Putting that fear asides, the company's policy to filter employees through probation shows that they are only interested in people who can contribute. And they are really hiring people based on trust, so hiding and lying to the firm about your education or employment history will do you no good. They will just terminate your employment soon after you join. Pardon my mistake for seeing you as desperate company for people, you are just being nice to give everyone who come by a chance.

I was feeling kinda down recently, but I am thankful for those who were there and will continue to be there for me, to listen to my rants daily, to hear me saying alien languages and still pretend to understand. Cant be more thankful to the existence of these people, especially when i am staying away from home. I guess I am gonna rise above all this and give my best at work daily Hopefully I will leave the company with no regret if I am told to. But I am just saying, please do not ask me to leave, I really love the company and job! T.T

Okay, my thoughts are more or less written down and cleared from my mind, so it is time to sleep! Woohoo, gonna start afresh tomorrow! Hwaiting :)

Ethel

Induction 07/01/2014, our paths crossed.

Taking my first annual leave from work in my life despite not having doing proper work for the past 1.5weeks.

I was on training for the past 1.5weeks, and reporting at 930am to the office daily feel the same as going to school not long ago. I didn't dread of going school or office, instead I'm looking forward to it. Looking forward to the chance to interact with people, be it colleagues, batch mates and am interested to know what is gonna happen for the rest of the day... Haha maybe it was just me who feels that way, but I really enjoyed myself ever since I started working. Well, perhaps I will change my opinion after my first month end! We shall see. 

Anyway, my batch mates and I sort of prefer to describe our life in the company as enrolling in NS. Hence yesterday was our POP. Lol, it was the end of our induction, and we will be dispersed to different corners of the office. It was pretty surprising to see how much we have bonded on the week(s). Perhaps the age gap between us is small?! However, just by looking at how we do not pick to sit beside any specific person over lunch, and be able to talk to whoever that is present at your table, I think we guys really know each other well. 

We had a dinner gathering after induction yesterday and though we are missing of 3 persons, it was awesome!! I really didn't expect this when I first joined the company; I was hoping for some partners for lunch when I signed the contract and it turned out to be better than I had expect. 

I am really thankful for you guys! :) Looking forward to the next batch outing or induction! Meanwhile, let's work hard, chill hard and play hard (in the pantry) together. Oh bond well with your various teams too! Lastly please think of me on 'beer and chips' day! *wink 

For work, I'm no longer HuiPin, but Ethel. No matter my name, my (pretend) extrovert characteristics remain. 

Ethel 

Weeks into working

I'm not sure what to do at this point of time, and so I thought of blogging.

I did mentioned at my previous post that I had found a job, and I started on 16 June.

There was a total of 7 new hires for OA, and I am really thankful for their existence. They were not just my lunchmates when I got 'neglected' by my team on the first day, they are also my help desk.  This week, we are having our induction and finally we had the chance to have lunch together in full strength plus a few others! And one thought strikes me today. We are intersecting with each other in the current part of our life, and after this, we will be parted. Fate allows us to meet, to know each other and work together, and I find it very amazing! Oh well, maybe thinking too much, but ya.

Anyway, work is tough and complicating when I were to join the team without induction. Knowing nothing, even performing shortcuts on excel spreadsheet can be complicating. Not to mention doing a proper rec.  Now then I realised why big firms only want to hire SMART ASS. If you are not smart, you cannot really help them. Everybody will be busy with their own tasks, meeting due time and all, they can't be there to help u out all the time, leave alone coaching!

But I do need to confess that I am taking some of things for granted. I have to admit that my buddy is being really kind and helpful, helping me out with small small issues, which I thought was nothing, but it turns out to be pretty useful and essential! Really need to thank him for that! My fellow colleagues are a bunch very nice people who are constantly giving me advice and helping me out! Thank you!! Despite you guys being very hiong at work, ignoring all the extra activities that were held at the office, we are amazing in our way. I was surprised by the birthday surprise given to new hire and those activities that the team is doing for team outing!

Oh well, none of them is going to see this post, but I shall just write it for myself as a memory (is it a correct word to use? Well, as long as I got my idea across! #whyusechimvocab)

My life is going on track now, and i will continue on with this road for awhile more before making small changes at a time. I am living up to my motto of enjoying every moment to the fullest! So yippee!!!!

Lol
HP

JOB HUNT IS OVER!

I GOT A JOB! And it is not some random job which wants me yet I have zero interest with. This job falls nicely into one of the many career paths that I have planned for myself. Yes, I do have many career paths planned, and the reason being I do not want to be restricted. When it comes to job searching, it is not entirely about what you want do ONLY. It is the intersection of what you want and where you can go with your experience coupled with market demand. Though some of my interviewers said that you must know exactly which path you want to go, the path that you want may not want you or you may not be suitable for it! So my advice is to open up your windows and embrace yourself with all the choices.

Despite having many career paths crafted out, you will realise that those paths will be narrowed down into a few catogies. At least it was the case for me. My career paths was being narrowed down into two (very different) industries. So during my job search, I look out fo jobs for these two paths and was about to settle down into either one when the opportunity comes. 

One important issue is that you must know where do you hope you will be in 5 or 10 years time. For me, I sorted out that one of my Paths is not as feasible as it will lead me to nowhere 5-10 years down the road, so I just dropped that out from my list.

Well, not like I have plenty of experience in this issue, but I just want to share what I really feels. 

Heading for work like a OL. Ending off.

HP

Wedding photos <3

Attended several weddings recently, and have seen plenty of wedding photos. Beautiful were all the photos, but they do not possess the correct vide of what I hope my wedding photos should have. 

It was until I was wasting my time exploring ig today that I found the vide that I was looking for - Koreanish wedding photo! Not sure if it was because it was in trend, or is it because I'm into Korean stuff now, those wedding photos blown me off~

Hopefully, when I'm getting married, my potential husband will have the capability of allowing us to indurge in such luxurious pre-wedding activity! It's once in my life time thing, so It must be done up nicely, right?! I hope that I would not have to settle for the usual stuff that most people do, but it is totally not to my liking.

Well~ not like I will be getting married soon, or I will be taking those photos in advance. But ya, feel free to browse their ig and experience the happiness of getting married!! 

To those who just got married, HAPPY MARRIAGE!! *heart heart* 

HP

😘😘

Harsh Truth about my results and UOL

Just before I opened my eyes this morning, I thought of the 'correct' way of doing one of the questions of my FM paper. WTF, why did not I thought of that during exam?! OMTian~

The next thing I thought was that: Would my final grade be affected? Once again, OMTian~ 
Eagerly, I take out my tablet, which was under my bed, and began searching for the scheme of award for UOL. It was damn hard to find. I found one at the HWZ forum, but that were kinda outdated. I need one which is more updated and official. Luckily, the contributor at the forum provided an official link, but the contents have been changed! Things always go against your wish. 

After much troubles, I found it.    
For those who are interested in knowing your award, or you would like to set an aim, pls refers to the following link.(This is the old regulation) 

http://www.londoninternational.ac.uk/sites/default/files/regulatons/2014/pdfs/psr_emfss_old_14-15.pdf

Download the one which is applicable to you under the "Undergrad" section, using this link

http://www.londoninternational.ac.uk/community-support-resources/current-students/programme-specifications-regulations/programme-specifications-regulations-2014-2015

I was actually aiming for a FCH, but then I understand how tough it would be to achieve 3 FC grade in my final year, given those modules that I was taking and etc factors.. Nonetheless, I tried my best, and hopefully I would be able to achieve a decent grade at the end of the day. 

After I read through the scheme, I have a mixed feeling. I think my chance of getting a FC is diminishing, and I was so close in getting it (using my forecast results). On the other hand, I kinda secured a 2nd Upper, which is something to be happy about. 

A lot of people might say that it does not really matters what is your degree at the end of the day. IKR, but it is sort of a little aim that I set for myself? After screwing up A's, this is the another chance to prove that I can do it?! I am the kind of person, who would really focus on the things on hand, and ignore all the others. Furthermore, the number of graduates at the convocation getting FCH will be significantly different from that of a 2nd upper. So ya, slight disappointment here.  

Anyway, it is kind of disappointing to see people doing UOL to give up even before going for their exam, just because people say that it is HARD. Different people will judge the level of difficulty differently. The same unit might be hard for one, but easy for another. You would not know unless you try, perhaps you are lucky, your paper might turns out to be easy on the year you are taking it. If you gave up, you just lost a chance to do well. Yeah?! 

Another thing, prioritising is very important during the preparation of exams. No matter how busy you are, with your work or other things, pls do remember that your ultimate goal is to graduate from the college. So, put every other things down and focus on your studies. You may skip local and overseas revisions, skip prelims, and do not attend school for half a year, please do not skip the preparation for exam. It is the utmost important issue! You can go no where without the preparation. Please do not think that you can study one or two days beforehand, and think that you can do it. You might have done that magic when you are in Sec school, but this is a degree that you will be getting, not some GCE cert. 

Oh well, if you drop by here after goggling SIM-UOL, I hope you are being motivated in one way or another. Well, I doubt my words can motivate anyone, so here is another link for those who would want to be motivated. I was kind of motivated to do well after reading this blog, but his method of revision sounds too harsh for me. I went on my own pace in the end. Nonetheless, be motivated by his posts!

My UOL Journey 

Enough of saying, ending here.

Cheers, HP

Graduated 'unofficially'

In the midst of writing an effective cover letter, but I am stuck. Just then, I remembered this (idk how long) abandoned blog of mine. Well, perhaps it is time to come and do some updates. 

Finally, I am "unofficially" graduated. Had my last paper last Friday, and I have been 'resting' since then. 

Life is always contradicting. When I was young, I have always been excited about the day when I can start working and contributes to the society..(Well, less of the contributing part, and more of the I wanna make money) Now that, I can officially and be able to work full time, I am dreading it. Too much dilemma and unknown ahead, and all of this is scaring me. The process of job hunting is terrifying too. But it is the process that one has to go through right, sucking it up. 

Graduating trip to Europe (especially popular) and some other countries are common, but I can go for none (as of now la), cause the Summer school last year costs me a bomb. The main obstacle is none other than my father, who feels that I am overspending. Well, he has got the point there, so objection will just fuel the chaos. BUT, at some point of time, when I am really stress out and explode, I might just pack my bag and off I go~

I am rather drained today, so I might not be continuing with my cover letter, and I might be moving on to watch my variety shows!

HP

Would fate gives u achievement which u have Nv work hard for?

Fate: What meant to be, will eventually be... But hardwork is still needed to push for it right? 

Final year of studies, and I'm setting an exceptionally high expectation for myself. Though I started (revision) early this year, as the remaining days get lesser, I got increasingly stress, it seems that I would not have enough time to complete my revision? 

Sometimes, I thought to myself: how about relaxing my expectations a little, then I would not be so stress up..? But then since it is the final lap, and you are going through it no matter what your expectation is, why not go the toughest way and hope for a best result? 

Two weeks left, I'm not sure if I would be able to handle it. Let's just pray for the best! 

HP

How to go on from here?

Time is running short, what to do?

It is less than 2 months to the FINALS, and I had been inefficient with studying this week. Really need to kick of my obsession with Crime related dramas, cause once you are hooked up, you cant do anything else.

While I was doing my household work today, I just realise that my aim to get a job before the exam ends seems impossible. The fear of having of being jobless after graduation strikes me.

Hais, if it is the case, then what to do? Just sucks it up and move on!

I am superstitious, so I really hope that the fortune of goat this year is as predicted, and I will have a smooth career life! Please~
(God, I sound so loser, but ya. When everything seems to fail, believing in fate is my only way out)

HP

Life as a GRADUATING

Was printing a set of lecture notes the other day - chapter 12. 

Time flies. It was just not long ago that I was still printing my chapter 1 notes, and thinking that this will be my final year. And time is going so fast that I am coming towards the end of my lectures, slowly moving to the final stage of my degree route, ie examination. 

Getting into SIM-UOL, it is freaking easy. Getting out with a good grades? It's tough man. Only people who have been through it would understand. Others might just think that it is because we never put in enough effort(it is true to some extend), just like how we failed to do well in the previous stage of our life. How many will actually think that perhaps our exams are really tough? Honestly speaking, not many whom I met would say that. 

Not like I would care much now, but then I would really want to say this here. 

Please do not have the idea that our examination are easy to score just because we didn't enter this school with good grades like you do for local. Perhaps you should just come and try it. Sometimes your so call 3000 modules is not even equivalent to our level 300 units; Sometimes MCQ is easier than our short answer Qn, as at least you will have 20%-25% chance of getting it correct, while we got 0% if we write rubbish.

Please do not think that SIM kids do not give a damn of their studies just because we are not as competitive as you guys do. We play hard and study hard, cannot ah? Jealous? And sometimes, it is not that we never study that lead to our poor performances, it is just because I'm not academic incline, that's why I am where I am now right?! Tsk.

Please do not think that you are better just because your school is a freaking local university. God. Kay la, smarter?!

So please, if you have a SIM kid in your clique, please do not verbal insult then when they tell you that they didn't do well for their exams. 'Hello, u think easy ah? Why you never get A for your mod har?' Same reasoning right?!

Whatever the case is, with graduation, here comes unemployment. Damn it. 

Scrolling through the job search sites, looking at the requirements of the employers, and blah blah blah. Before I even start to find a job proper, I'm feeling tired that I would want to take a rest. I have a sudden urge to continue studying, and continue to be a potato at home, sucking in all nutrients. But I can't, ya?! It's funny that when we were younger, we always have the thought of quitting school and go out to earn some money, thinking that it is damn cool; but when the time comes, you want to do otherwise. 

I wanted to write about the job search only, but then things always do not go according to how you wished for. So yalo. 

HP

爱情 这一回事

一对情侣，从相识，相熟，到相爱，再到决定共结连理 到底需要多长的时间？ 

如果说半年，有人就会质疑你们到底有多了解，毕竟结婚是件一辈子的事。

但若在一起太久了，就会开始看到彼此丑陋的一面，种种的疑问慢慢浮现，如到底你是否可以跟这样的一个人过一辈子？有些时候，因为在一起久了，而忘了什么才是自己真正想要的；随波逐流般，跟眼前的人结婚，过着自己以为这就是幸福 的人生，但其实不然。

要怎样才会知道你遇上对的人，这我不知道。但我知道若遇上的那个对的人，那两人凑备婚礼的过程，不论对婚礼的细节有意见上的差异，应该还是会很开心的！两人对未来也应该充满憧憬。

我不是什么爱情专家，爱情也不是理科，有固定的方程式；面对困难的选择时，跟着自己的感觉走，才是上选。

A tai tai evening~

The cheese platter I made myself!

On last Friday, I went to the Chocolate Bar at MBS for their chocolate buffet. It is located at level 57, and so in order to be allow in, one has to make reservation in advance. So to prevent disappointment, we did our reservation and only got our slot at 9.30pm. The timing sucks, but we just stick with it. 

The ambience was really good, you get to see the infinity pool and etc. But I thought the buffet was just okayy only. I was only impressed by their free flow of TWG tea. I thought the choices was rather limited, even though I read on some other blogs/forums that say they it has 57 different variety. Perhaps there were this many variety, but none leave a deep impression on me, except for the cheese section. There were quite a number of cheese available for one to choose from, and after trying plenty, I found one of it, by the name of 'port sulat', i am not sure if I it the name correctly, but it was great! 

Overall, I thought if you would want to experience how is it feel like to dine in such a refine place, it would be a good place to go. It's a great place to take photos too! Haha it was rather great to sometime pamper yourself with luxury dining! ✌️

HP

27/12/2013

I am a very emotional controlled person; meaning, my actions are mostly based on my emotions. 

If you are not to my liking, but unfortunately under my control, it's either me ending up with depression, or you undergoing hell from me. Usually it's the latter, as I grow older and gain more power.

I do not really care if you like me a not, as long as your action disturbs me, I would not hestitate to torture you, making you feel worse than I do. 

You break your promises, so nice treatment does not apply anymore. If it's the pay that you are after, I suggest you don't try, cause you will end up paying more, emotionally. Well, it is just 4 days more, I shall see. 

Am I pin pointing you? Yes, I am! Why? Do some reflection yourself. Are you taking work seriously? Or are you here to preach and socialize? If you are here for the latter reason, perhaps you should pay me. 

**************************************************

Should have posted this on the above mentioned date, but then as seen, I failed! LOL. 

Anyway, I was only a demon for 1-2 days. Didn't managed to have my demon side shown longer. So ya. 

HP

12/11/2013

Was thinking of posting something, but I was not sure what to write. Then I think through the various dates I have in the coming week, and realise that yes, I do have something which I would say.

Rejecting a proposal is not something which I would normally do. Maybe because of my character, I would agree to almost all proposal that was suggested. But then I usually accepted before thinking about whether can I handle it. Like whether can I make it, physically, financially, sometimes i even accept proposals which are against my will. 

**************************************************

Once again, I failed to upload it, idk why! Maybe cause I did not complete writing the other time.

Anyway, this shall be my new year resolution then: to learn to reject proposed dates which I do not really like/enjoy going. 

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2014! 

HP

FB doesn't make me happier

The reason which I do not enjoy browsing through FB is that I will be self abased. 

I think I'm going through the minor downturn of my life, so seeing how others are fulfilling their life with interesting events make me sad. 

And as known by all, most people will try to use the page to portray the best side of themselves, despite it not being 100% of their true self, ie fake. But does it matter? I am still affected by some of the updates despite knowing that those are perhaps all their happz moment in their life. 

I'm not sure if I am writing with sense at this moment, because I will behave as though I'm drunk when I'm sad. But all to do, suck it up and live on right. 

HP

Life at 22

Taken using my iPhone when I was climbing the Hallasan in Jeju, Korea. #nofilter

Till now, I still hve no idea how I managed to complete it.

I has been dwelling over one question for awhile. It is not once that I arrived at the answer at this period, then overthrow it at the other. Maybe that's just me. 

Right now, I'm yelling for everything to come to a stop, so that I can think properly. But nothing would. 

Life goes on as usual. Gonna live with it anyway. 

October's

My October was rather eventful(according to my definition). 

First, I celebrated my bestie's birthday at Lantern of the Fullenton Bay Hotel. The view there was amazing, and we really had a good time there! Happy 21st TL! Saranghaeyo~ 

Ps: I love this photo cus I look slim! Lol.

Then, it was the wedding of my 'long lost friend'! I met her a few years back during an accounting course, and we found out that we used to be kindergarten classmate after awhile! Fate actually brought us back together! 

I am really glad that you found the right one after going through all the ups and downs, and I believe that he will certainly treat you well. 要幸福喔！Thanks for having me on this wonderful day!! Love you lots. See you soon!

Finally meet up with my CHINGUs whom I met in Korea. We have been talking about having a lunch together for awhile, and finally we had one today! 

We talked a lot, which was very much to our surprise. We even talked about how we get to know each other a few months back, ie in the toilet of our dorm. Glad that someone initiated a convo back then. 

Why didn't we took a photo together?! So here is a vanilla soufflé which we ate earlier today at PS as a replacement.

That's about it for October. Heehee not like there is a lot, but it is to me. 

HP

Crave for Korea Food

Craving for Korea Food now, though I have just made an appointment w my friends to have it in two weeks time, it did not help much. So well~

The urge of going to Korea is getting stronger recently, but the harsh fact of having no money put out the fire. 

I feel like learning korea language and work in Korea in the future. Should I set it as my goal?! Is it practical? Tsk. 

Whatever the case may be, I shall continue to live in my Korean surrounded world. BBYOUNG! 

😘

There is no makchang in Singapore! Sobs😭

SHOE PARTY @COACH PARAGON 2013

I was invited to the Fall 2013 Collection Shoe Party recently. It was a private event whereby only guests with invitation can get it. It was held at the Coach boutique at Paragon Orchard. The entire experience was pretty awesome. Well, you will seldom feel nothing about being able to attend such event. 

Since it was a Shoe Launch, there were plenty of shoe displayed. Be it MAN's or WOMEN's. (There was a lot more, just that I didnt take a photo of those, since I wasnt thinking of blogging about it professionally!)

Some might find buying branded shoes/heels/whatever are a waste of money, since no one will notice that you are wearing a branded, especially for those simple yet classic designs. Well, for Coach's, they have their logo displayed as below, making it obvious to all that you are wearing a BRANDED one. Well, this really added on to the value of the pair of heel. 

And what's more, their shoes are definitely not of mass production. How do I know? Well, just by looking at the sole of all those shoes, you will see Coach's logo engraved onto it. If a pair of shoes is from a mass production, you will at most see the brand logo printed on the insole of the shoe and nothing else. But having a logo engraved onto the sole, it means that those are  produced just for Coach, value adding to the pair once again! 

So, next time, I hope you will know how to gauge whether a pair of shoe is worth its value. Well, it will need quite a lot of experience. LOL.     

 There was a little competition going on at the party, whereby guests were to post a photo taken with any pair of Coach shoe on instagram. Winner will receive a pair of COACH sunglasses. I wasnt sure what hit me that day that I didnt really bother to pose with any of the shoes, but just spammed photos with all the bags I see! I really have a thing for bags, I guess~ I kind of like the leopard print one(second photo), but I did not get it. 
FYI: The pink/red looking handbag is mine! 

Finally, here a photo of the girl who attended the event with me! Thank you <3 p="">

Take care~

YZ//HP//WS

My dear friend is leaving for UK soon! Though we would seldom meet up if he stays on, the thought of him leaving to a far away place is making me sad. 

I hope u will enjoy your days over there, and don't forget your promise of buying some cheap branded for me! Haha lol! 

Till we meet again, GOOD LUCK! 

Cute postcard that yongzhen did for him!

HP