世界的残酷现实，使我无法呼吸。
我不得不戴上面具，假装微笑。
是我太软弱吗？还是我面对不了现实？为何我久久无法释怀？
持续的伪装，让大家认为我好了，不过把我累坏了！

。。。

我可是比大半部分的人还要幸福，有个如此好的家庭背景，衣食无忧，还可以读那么多的书。
可是我有珍惜啊，我有努力啊，为何有这样？
为何我想要的都无法得到？！这可是我一直以来的心愿，可我的幸福离我越来越远。
安慰的话听多了，就麻木了，填补不了那受了伤的心！


。。。


想要逃离，可我逃离不了。
想过的更好，可我要做不到。
只好继续虚伪，伪装，假装微笑。

这就是我的我的生活，我的命运。
我会试图突破这些，因为这不是我想要的。

With the completion of the last paper for my accounting course, everything came to an end! I think I have did my best, and I really hope
That I can do very well, like all distinctions! Okay, better don't be a BITCH! Just wanna add on about my internal exam results! Well, the feelings of being outstanding is good, but pressurising when it comes to preparing for the actual exam, cause you knw u cannot afford for do worse than before!

Adv. Business Calculation: 96
Business Statistic: 59
Accounting: 79
Cost Accounting: 66.5
Managment Accounting: 76.5
Those were my result, and I certainly hope that I will do better for the actual one! ESP for BS, and I think I will, given the fact that I
Finally can do hypothesis testing without GC! Lol!

Anw, now that the lessons are over, i will be more available on weekdays night! A good thing or a bad thing? I'm not a night life person, so it doesn't really matter to me anyway! Just that the thought of not meeting my ACCTG friends every week, makes me a little sad! Sobs! My acctg friends are the least inwould expect out from this course! I intended to go for this course, alone, and maybe make friend with the one sitting next to me! However, it turns out that I not just only make friend w the one next to me, I am good friends with the one in front, behind and etc! Claps! All thanks to xiaorou, for being so friendly and bonded all of us together! Will certainly rmb the times we spent together! Love
them always! I hope that what we hope and plan for will be executed in the near future and that we will remain friends for a long time! :)

Time to focus on my uni stuff! :) IBM, ECONS, SOCIO, MATH AND STAT, here I come! :D

HP

God, today is a super eventful day for me pls! It's just making myself doubting myself all over again! TIAN! I don't really wanna share this elsewhere, be it fb or twitter, just dont really want to mention it again, and I gotta admit that I sucks ttm!

Totally not in the mood of study for my exam which is tmr! Luckily I had prepared for it long ago! Aiming to scoring full marks tmr, and I hope the questions don't screwed and I better not to! Seriously, having severe mood swing right now! Feels like scoldin @&$$/)/):"(@6, but no place to rant! Hais!

That it! Oya, didn't manage to do well today, totally hard w poor ACCTG concept! God! My life is so Fup today! Give me a better one tmr! I only ate a biteful of beef, don't punish me!!!! ;(

HP

5/11/11


MET UP W CLUBBERS!! yes, we meet up like finally, after one year?!! haha did our usual activity, which is to eat, and buffet for sure! Anw, went to TWO DAYS ONE NIGHT @ TANJONG PAGAR! And this is no joke, we waited for 2 hrs just to wait for our turn to eat! The first person arrived at like 530pm, and the queue number we got were like 44? That was crazy, it was until 8plus thn we FINALLY got our seat, and that was until J starts to show faces to the waitress! HAHA, so dont you mess w J! Anw, others were beginning to get hungry and thus angry! But ya! So we spent the waiting time at some food court near by, and as usual GOSSIP TIME! LOL, mayb cus we didnt meet up for a loooong time, we were digging each others love life man! and that was FUN! Cus we will hear CRAZY STUFF which u would nv think of! haha LOL! Brought my CAM along, so we took a plenty of PHTS, though MS kinda complain about my lousy cam but ya, i think i care?!

Anw, i ate a tiny bit of beef just now, cus TS kiap one for me, and i feel so SINFUL, tht im gonna go faced my GYM(guan yin ma). But the rest thot GYM was gym! hahas it is okay, need that equally! And, i think i must be crazy to volunteer to organise the next outing for them in a month time! Tian, sot de wo!
Whatever, love the time together! <3 so meetingup would be a problem, but whr shall we go? hmm..mayb i shld consider the list of restaurant that PY gave me!!

HP with love!

Hello! Finally here to update about my HAPPENING WEEK!!

01/11/2011

GROUP PHOTOS

IT WAS MY BDAY CELEBRATION! Planned w my HJM and invited WW and YS to come along. Seriously speaking, I have to admit that i was paranoid about the meeting of both cliques, as you knw, there will be awkwardness between them. However, i did not do anything, and im glad that i didnt, cus it turned out pretty well! :) And there was a tiny surprise, when i knw that CH and QW are coming too! OMG, it has been long since i last see them, it is last 1 to 2 years already? HJM and I arrived at 15minutes @lasselle first, while WW and others come later. There was a little ganga when the latter arrived; cus i was busying talking to them, updating stuff and all, yknw. Haha, and kinda neglected my HJM! Still we managed to took a group pht despite the ganga! Haha
Continue our 2nd round at TIMBRE@ OLD SCHOOL(did i spelled correctly?) Anw, both cliques got more close yknw! hahah HAPPY at that! Thanks for the cake, HJM! <3 Thanks CH and QW for the cake, and for their attendance, seriously didnt expect the two of u to turn up! thanks, YS and WW for coming, Hope u two are not bored in the middle! :)


HJM! LOVE THEM!!


HMM.. what is our name? JN7 plus 3GF? LOL i rmb your burst into laughter at this name ovr at 15 minutes!

LOve you all MOSTTTT! :D

HP, 20, still loved by all!

Weeeeee, met up w YZ and IRENE on WED! Omg, it was Deepavali pls, and it was super crowded everywhr, which made me kinda pekcek, but thn it would be hard to meet up on some other days, so ya, so be it! It was great meeting up w them, enjoyed every moment, no gan ga at all, it just means that we built our friendship strong in the past, so it does not really matter how different our path are right now, this are what i called true friends! And, dont worry, i wont forgt the two of u in just one yr! <3 Some rundown of what we did ytd: Some jap restaurant at Novena, thn walk walk in Bugis, from juntion to illuma and finally to bugis street. Lei max pls! I am totally not suitable to be a taitai to shop all day long! i would prefer to just stay at home and watch drama! LOL, as if i found rich guy!


Finally MARBLE SLAB at Illuma! Yummy!


Spammed some polariod, credits to IRENE!

and yes, finally helped Irene to create a new account on FB, woohoo! Easier to tag her now!! :)

Went out w HJM today! Shopping for two consecutive days, slept like dead log on the way home, hopefully i was not stomp! Anw, spend like 100 over today at Editors' market! omg, finally got the feeling of being broke! Cant imagine how am i gonna survive next wk! Anw, ate Billy smth smth, there is a 1for1 lunch treat, so had that in the aftnn w TL!

Nice pork rib, but mafan to eat!
We are too lazy to be true, but we still choose to eat that! (Cause it is even harder to eat drumstick and chicken wing, JOKE) Good choice but bad move, it cost us a tiny bomb, which could hav been save for later use. alright, it's all over now.

Saw a kinda nice top over at F21, but no money leh, didnt even bother to chk the price out! Alright, tht is it for today! Talk more next time!

HP

LOVE this PHOTO, CHIO MAX!

Last Friday, there was a BELATED BDAY SURPRISES for TL! Omg, it was fun but tiring, and i mean it!

Following are the brief desciption of ALL the surprises!

SURPRISE 1:
Gotten one of our SOCIO friend to pass her the small present, and we srsly agreed that we had chosen the correct guy! He was like confessing to TL la, omg, the process was ttly HX. esp when TL refused to accept the present cus tht guy is attached! and TL was really surprise by that! YEAH! SUCCESS!

SURPRISE 2:
After our SOCIO lecture, one guy just chiong into the Lecture and present a SUNFLOWER to TL, and told TL that: wo xiang he ni zhuo peng you! LOL, apparently TL knw the trick and replied him: Hmm, i knw everything alrdy, Thanks ah! OMG, BEN's heart is broken! He went complaining about why isnt him the first to give the surprise! the SUNFLOWER is super chio pls! OMT! <3

SURPRISE 3:
As we entered the LT for ECONS, a girl tapped on TL's shoulder and pass her a box of cupcakes, telling her: MANFRED asked me to pass this to U! Everyone just burst into laughter! MANFRED is our econs lecturer, btw! lol! TTLY funny!

SURPRISE 4:
Settling down with the cupcakes and all in the LT, we gotta LK's friend, Nigel to help us to take some photos. After the phto taking, before he go off, he told TL: hmm, i think u drop something.. ! After some searching, we found a box of present on the floor, under the chair, w a heart on it! I didnt expect to see that, but ttly kaixin to see that, so NICEEE! Anw, ya!

SURPRISE 5:
While i busy myself in distracting TL to pick a cupcakes which she wanna eat, LK slotted the last and tiny present in her cardigan. Then she told TL that, there is still one more present, ni zhao yi xia! Again, she found it after some search! And thats the endddd! Claps!!

The entire process was LEI, cus unlike in JC where we knw alot more ppl and are more or less together all the time, in SIM, we are kinda separated (as in PY and US), and luckily we get to knw some ppl here and there, thus able to have a pretty successful surprise! CLAPSSS! ESP to lk, who looked so pale and sick tht day! Take care, babeh!PY and ME, of cus for getting ready in 10 mins, just to get everything!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to our YOUNG GIRL ONCE AGAIN! OMG, i cant forgt what YK said to u,'if i give u a present, would u accept?' If i were u, i think i will react ttly differently! And, rmb the same trick cant be play twice!! WINK WINK!!! TTLy hinting! lol!

HP

That goes another hectic week and I'm glad that I survived! Out of the 5 tests for LCCI, I think I have only yet to do
My best for one paper, and Im pretty happy abt it! Anw, i was kinda coaching my fellow classmates during the test, cus they dk how to do! The same thing i mentioned previously happened, someone just take my paper for reference! K, this is not the main point i want to say here, what i intrnded to say was that, during the test, one of the classmates actuallly said, she cant do this, cus she have yet to memorise all thr formula! Well, this just reminds me of myself in the past! Though i didnt say those words, but ya! I wanted to talk her that actually it is not the fact that u dk the formula tht resulted in U not able to do the questions! Even if u memorize the formula, u still cannot do, cus u don't uds! And what makes u think that u don't have to memorize the formula cus this is just a preliminary, do u knw, it will actually gauge how well u can do in the end?! Obv I didn't tell her this, cus our friendship bond is not that strong to counter such words!

Next was the soci and IBM test, well, it was both a open book test, I try my best, though I did not do as well for ibm's, but it is just the first test which does not count, YA?! Haha will work really hard after my dip, and be prepared for upcoming test!

Will be pretty free over the next 2 weeks, but really gotta study! Really hope to Get 5 distinctions for my dip at the end of the day, but well, I guess I would have to work harder! One week term break coming in one week's time, can't wait for it, but yknw, it doesnt really seems to make a difference to me, as I have only 2 days of school! The idea of being in SIM is beginning to sink in, but then still, it will be the topic
Which hurt me most when quarreling. Everytime when I quarrel with my parents, the fact that I failed to get into the local
Uni will also get into the picture, with regardless whether is it relevance! Here I am, feeling so bad about it, and there u are, talking about it when u knw that I care most?! Idk really what to say, I feel like crying just by writing it here! But I'm gonna stay strong, I landed myself here, so I gotta do the best out of it! I dont care whether arena going to sponsor me for my summer school Abroad, if I'm going, I will go if I can, with or without your consent!

The best thing now is that I guess I have really found my life long friends! And when you grow older, such friends are no longer call BFF BUY
HJM- Hao Jie Mei! Haha after experiencing so many long and short, good and bad friendships, I realize that true friends are those who will tolerate your nonsense, cus they knw this is u! They will think of u, when they have goodies on hand! And also change their topics cos u dont uds the previous one! And many many other things which I just can't describe in words, poor w expressing man! Omg, glad that I found
such friends! Wink wink @HJM, I guess u knw who you are!! :)

HP

I am so bored, but I don't feel like studying at all! Even though I am in the amist of exam, I still feel this way, tian ar! Gotta buck up alrdy! The idea of having school for two days only is beginning to settle down, and I am slowly getting use to it! No more Monday blues for the rest of the terms! Woohoo! When my accounting lesson ended, I will be kinda free, can't wait for that!

Anw, attended TL 19th birthday @ibis hotel ytd! And it was great! Though there was small xiao ganga at first, but it ended off pretty well! Are u Srsly touched? Look so fake!!! Lol! Just joking! Can't believe that u are so youn that, when we graduate together, u will only be 21! Omg! Feel so old!!! :( whatever, I'm young at heart!

Met my neighbor last Friday and we bused home together! And she told
Me that she finally found a BF! So kaixin for her, ESP after she had waited for her love to come for a long time! On the right, i see how happy is a girl when she is in a relationship; however, over the other end, I see how tired it is to maintain a relationship when both parties are busy and etc.. Dk why I suddenly talk about this, but ya!

Time to go study now, talk more the next time when I have something to talk about!

HP:)

It's seems like long ago since I last posted! Anw, it was just school as usual for te past weeks, butnit had just gone a lil too hectic! First, is that all the tests seem to have arranged beforehand and come together and cramp into my two tiny weeks! Dont really like it, but what can i do? Ya?

Anw, did a math test today, and the lecturer exaggerated on the diffucultly of the paper! Mayb cus we were from jc, the paper seems do able! Just that you can using gc or sc, this caused to have to calculate all the tiny lil stuff manually, which Srsly time consuming! But whatever the case is, i don't think I will do well, cus I did study much, can't even integrate simple stuff after beautifying it from a ugly creature! Oh! Hahaha, hopefully I get above 10! Pls! Single digit seems cui!

And oh, I had my cost accounting internal paper yesterday! Glab that inwas able to 3/5 of the paper,given the fact i did study as much as others! The others seem so well prepared that they kinda stress me out during the self revision time! But it turns out that they studied as much as me only! One of them even took my paper for reference! I mean I don't mind lending you, but at least borrow those qns u knw how to do, but unsure of some parts. Don't take my paper and take reference when u dk how to start the qns at all! Though I didn't take a proper look at how much did u take reference from, hopefully not the entire qns! But idk! Kay, i knw I'm kinda a competitive bitch over this, but ya, I do care alot for this course! Take it or leave it!

Talk more next time! Time for a good rest and laugh before the remaining 4 internal exams and 2 test next week! Bye ppl! (like telling story, but who cares?!) my friends are complaining at the amount of photos being uploaded each day, but I knw there are ppl out there enjoying all the photos! Hahaha Ttly zl! Bye for real

HP

Went out w YS AND WW YTD!
It was pretty great! We talked(but ususually the more happening one talk more, not me obviously)
Anw, they came Msia to find me actually, so it was really convinient for me to come out actually! Didn't took much photos ytd, none actually! Didn't utilize my smart phone fully!

Anw, we cabbed around JB ytd, and the first taxi driver was so funny! Cos we were talking vigourously in both Chinese and english, I think it sounds interesting, hence the Malay driver actually asked me if I could say that in malay! But I told me, my Malay is quite limited! Haha but I think the driver just wanna to talk! While that can be a happy experience taking the cab! Another was not that good! When we was about to leave jusco and go back to cs, the taxi driver actually quote a price which is two times more than what we paid just now! Not wanna be some vegetable head to be chop by them, we took our cab on the main road, which go by meter. Thinking back now, I feel kinda angry! I should have told the driver: HELLO SAYA ANAK MALAYSIA JUGA Damn it! I'm not foreigner for goodness sake, I need to take cab only cos I have yet to receive my license! Thanks!

Whatever the case may be, just forget it! And be smarter next time!

Got myself a new wallet! Oh, I can't upload photo here, it's okay then, just describe it here! It's a MNG Red colour long wallet!(don't really knows the exact name of that wallet!) so, gonna say GOODBYE TO GUESS AND HELLO
MNG! omg, I'm so going fruitty like PY! :D

Anw, ww bought the same wallet but blue in colour while we buy a beige colour one for YS as belated
Bday present!



Going lunch plus dinner soon! That's it! Bye! :)

HP

Have a sudden urge to blog and idk why! Been rather active on twitter recently that I think I don't have much to say here! mayb I shld just update abt my school life! Although I only have two days of school per week, but the work load seems heavy! I seem to have endless tutorials and assignments, plus the fact that I need to do some self study as sometimes those stuff just can't get into my mind the first time! Oh my tian! But overall, school is still pretty fun, I can say to be looking forward to school every week!

I hope next week will turn out fine! Pls!

And it's time to make the familiar strange again! Shld I start to make notes? Seems kinda early though, nv had i do revision so early in my previous school time! I have changed! Seriously! Though the fact hurts, still, I hope I can hang it through and be proub of myself once again!

First week of school! Woohoo! Overall not bad! Besides the fact that my bag Ttly fails on me on the first day and that I missed the stop to alight and found myself lost on the second day! The school environment is pretty good, especially the new building where it is fully air conditioned, and there is a power plug to each seat in the LT, what else should I ask for!

Seriously, though my attention span is only 1.5hr the MAX, I think all my lecturers are GD! They just explained it over and over again, knowing that yo don't understand! Life is turning out pretty well right now! Simply love it! Woohoo!!!! With all this, it's really time to get settled back to be a FT student and STUDY hard! Mugging just don't help, so ya!

It is troublesome to think of what to wear for every school day though, glad that I was in jc previously! The school day is like 6 days away? So damn far! Haha but it's ok, can use the time to study! :)

Ending here, will update soon!

HP

After rotting for such a long time, my school is finally gonna start soon!!
You know, when u are away from school for a long period of time, u will tend to miss school alot! So much so that you can't wait for have your textbook in front of you, so that you will have something to do!

But all this will only applies to the period before school starts! When school finally start, I think I will be waiting for holidays to come! Even though I m having school for two days per week only! Gosh! Gotta be a self motivating mugger when school starts!

So girls, Let's jiayou together!

Omg, i just cannot stay away from my iPhone for more than 15min long! Especially when I started playing tiny tower! I just wanna to look at it, even though I knw that there is not much thing which I can do! I am seriously addicted! Gosh, gonna keep my iPhone hidden somewhere after I posted this post! So that I can concentrate in doing my cost accounting homework! Exams are coming really soon, like 3 more months? Am doing past year paper right now, but I just got the feelings that idk how to do! Stress! And the fact that I am taking a total of 5 subjects and gotta do revision for all of them make me a little stress! Tian ar! Im so afraid to fail again! Gotta start early for revision and hopefully do well this time! Jiayou!! :)

HP

im heading to sch right now for the orientation day. I hope it will be fun! Anw, im srsly to lei right now to show my excitment! Urgh, will hav to wake up as early as tday when sch reopens. Luckily i only hav two study days!

Got myself an iphone 4, and everything jst seems unreal from the point i entered the singtel shop! Woo, took exactly 24hrs to realise tht it is the truth! kinda lag though! Hahas but ya!!

it's time to be thrifty, so that i can save up to be 'you jian ren' agn!

Anw, i jst hope tht i will not be late for sch ltr!!

HP:)

Im having a test later, and thr are srsly alot of formulae to memorise. This is jst not my forte, i always sucks at memorising, cus i am lazy!

Anw, i read something rly funny ytd at fb. He said he hates two-faces ppl, cus it is giving him a hard time to decide which side of the face should he slap! OMG, it is so damn funny!!

Catchin some out-dated HK drama right now, it's nice! (Y)

Off to study right now, dont miss my updates!

I am sick! I got FAKE chicken pox, it is actually a mild type of chicken pox. I had chicken pox once whn im young, idk why im still havin it now!

I didnt knw tht it is chicken pox initially, so when i see one(pox), i will scratch it and squeeze it till it burst. and if you knw, if u squeeze out the pox, it will leave a scar, and it will be forever! OMG! Luckily, none of the pox grows on my face! :)

Anw, since it is a milder type of CP, im still able to function as usaul. Will most likely be gng SGP tmr to meet dap! If not, will be stayin at msia and chiong my hmw!! i still have 129days frm LCCI, gonna take it seriously!

Jiayou, HP!!! :)

OYA, i ttly forgt to mention about the fact tht i tried Tutti Frutti YTD!
It's something like YAMI, jst tht it is Self Service. They are so jian to not hav small size cup, so I hav no choice but to take the middle size one.

U can fill in as much ice cream u wan, they also allow mix flavours. Cuz they will calculate the cost by weighing it.

I chose only two flavours, original and chocolate at first, thn my dad ask me to choose one more, happily i go and add one more flavour into the cup, yes passion fruit!

Moving on to the topping corner, i was looking for peanut, but there is no peanut, so i added some black and yellow raisins. My dad requested for tht.

Finally, paying time! I forgt how heavy it was, the thing i knw is tht is COST RM18! Actually, it's not that expensive, given that it is yogurt ice cream and the size and amount. It can be equivalent to YAMI jumbo size! So yup!

Chocolate tasted like normal ice cream, i still prefer the original and passion fruit one. Woohoo! I want to try it again! Somebody accompany me, but it's only available in Msia! I forgt to take pic of it ytd, so i will take it next time i have it.

i hope that some managment of frutti tutti would see this and offer me some voucher! In return i will help to advertise it right here!!

Hahas shamelessly asking for free voucher right now. But thats me :)

HP

Angry Bird is such a LAME game! I CSI anymore!
I hav always heard about this game, saw many of birdie soft toys and tshirt, but I hav nvr tried playing it before(i thot). I thot that it is a really fun game, until i played it ytd, it was suppose to be my first time playing anw. Stage 1 and u gotta shoot the green pig position betwn blocks of wood. Suddenly, i recalled tht i played it before! Long time ago before it become a hot game, using irene's galaxy. I rmb asking her what type of game it is and after i played the first few stages, i quit, saying it is so boring.

First of all, why is the pigs position in between those blocks of ice, wood or metal? the bird captures them? If they hav, they could hav just kill it, since they are like so damn to be able to break an ice cube in one hit.

Anw, i knw it is jst a game, it would not go according to theory. Just like how i love playing cake mania, and thr is ttly no reason why i only bake the cakes when someone order it.

I may sound ttly serious, but trust me, I AM NOT.

CSI= cant stand it!
Haha, so proub of myself, constantly created shortform for words/phrase!

HP